Breathe
by IlovemyDeanBean
Summary: Part One of several parts in this CoopChen story


Her hands went down to her stomach. It was becoming habit. A way of comforting  
  
herself as she went through her parents things in China. They all seemed to be  
  
walking on eggshells around her.  
  
The new, abandoned pregnant child of two people all their friends and family  
  
loved. She could tell by their eyes, they wanted to know if the father was  
  
acceptable.  
  
If the father was black.  
  
Like a sad storm, the papers flew around her, like a patheic snow. Jing Mei  
  
let out a cry. No tears yet.  
  
**************************  
  
You say I've been driving you crazy  
  
And it's keeping you away  
  
**************************  
  
Nick was laughing. Laughing hard, slapping his thigh. Everyone around him,   
  
back at the hospital, was lost in the moment, too.  
  
"MVA coming in" Jerry called.  
  
They all turned to stare at the man behind the desk.  
  
"Mood killer" Nick mumbled, following after a few collegues.  
  
"Just doing my job, man" Jerry answered back,eyebrows furrowed. The time Nick  
  
had spent at the hospital, his mood sure had changed.  
  
***************************  
  
So just give me one good reason  
  
Tell my why I should stay  
  
'Cause I don't want to waste another moment  
  
Saying things we never meant to say  
  
****************************  
  
She zipped up the last suitcase, watching the movers come and go through the house,  
  
make their way through the office, big, black boot prints on the white rug.  
  
Jing Mei held her breath, holding her purse to her chest.  
  
"Is that all, cousin?" the quick rapid Chinese snapped her out of her semi-day dream.  
  
"Cousin?"  
  
She nodded, waiting for them all to slowly disappear away, and take in the new  
  
shell of a home before going to the airport. Before it was time to face reality.  
  
That was the scary part.  
  
*****************************  
  
I hold my breath and count to ten  
  
I've been waiting for a chance to let you in  
  
*****************************  
  
"Coop, there's a message here for you, from...Chen." Frank called.  
  
He looked up at the clock, Nick's hands were kneading his back. "When did  
  
I get this message, Frank?"  
  
The older man shrugged.  
  
Nick rolled his eyes. Snapped up the pink slip of paper and folded it several  
  
times before slipping it into his pocket.  
  
"You aren't going to read it?"  
  
He turned around slowly."Why?"  
  
"Cause she wants you to pick her up at the airport at 2."  
  
"2 am?" he choked.  
  
"Read the damn note" Frank muttered.  
  
******************************  
  
If I just breathe…  
  
Let it fill the space between  
  
Oh no, everything is alright  
  
Breathe… every little piece of me  
  
You'll see everything is alright  
  
If I just breathe  
  
********************************  
  
She kept talking shallow, easy breaths. Heart racing, the stewardess kept  
  
asking her if everything was okay. There was sweat beading on her forehead  
  
her cheeks flushed.  
  
"I'm...I'm fine"  
  
Jing Mei closed her eyes, remembering the way Frank's eyes had fallen. He looked..  
  
trapped. She couldn't really dredge up what they had said, but he had signed the  
  
papers reluctantly.  
  
She didn't know Nick well enough to predict his reaction. And it scared her.  
  
"Ma'am?"  
  
Jing Mei looked up, her eyes watering, tears racing down her cheeks.  
  
"Would you like a beverage?"  
  
  
  
***********************************  
  
If I just breathe...  
  
***********************************  
  
She had curled up in his arms when the Embassy called again. Wanting to confirm   
  
travel plans.  
  
She had pulled away, turned her back to him, curled back up, and tangled herself  
  
in the sheets.   
  
Nick stood at the edge of his bed. She never said, "I have to do this."  
  
She was just gone when he woke up. He held her for most of the night. The  
  
weird thing about this woman was, she shook and cried, but there was no tears.  
  
He was certain she didn't feel comfortable enough around him to cry yet.  
  
But that was the confusion of sex. He threw himself into the dirty sheets. A haphazard  
  
belly flop into the mattress.  
  
Nick closed his eyes, and disappeared into dark.  
  
********************************  
  
Well the talks are overrated  
  
Am I saying how you feel?  
  
So you end up watching chances fade  
  
And wondering what's real  
  
********************************  
  
The dawn of morning light, she stood as a shadow in his doorway.  
  
The single key he kept in the potted plant outside his door dug into  
  
her skin. He had thrown himself lazily onto the bed. An arm dragged along  
  
the floor. She could hear the sound of his deep easy breaths.  
  
"Holy shit" he muttered, sitting up suddenly.  
  
She held her breath, waiting for the light to flip on. Then she remebered the light  
  
coming from the hall. The shadow that fell across her new profile. Her new shape.  
  
"D..Deb?"  
  
She stood in the doorway, and bit her lip.  
  
**********************************  
  
And I… get you just a little time  
  
I wonder if you realize  
  
I've been waiting 'til I see it in your eyes  
  
*********************************** 


End file.
